Daily Joke: Jokes Library

The little mouse was trapped in the corner by the huge cat.

Slowly the cat advanced on the little trapped creature.

The mouse looked up and went:-

Woof woof woof woof!

Surprised the cat turned and fled.

‘ and that ‘ said the daddy mouse to his children.

‘ is the importance of learning a second language ‘

A couple was relating their vacation experiences to a friend.

“It sounds as if you had a great time in Texas,” the friend observed.

“But didn’t you tell me you were planning to visit Colorado?”

“Well,” the husband said,

“we changed our plans because, uh…”

His wife cut in,

“Oh, tell the truth, Fred!”

He fell silent, and she continued,

“You know, it’s just ridiculous. Fred simply will NOT ask for directions.”

Thomas is 32 years old and he is still single.

One day a friend asked,

“Why aren’t you married? Can’t you find a woman who will be a good wife?”

Thomas replied,

“Actually, I’ve found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn’t like them.”

His friend thinks for a moment and says,

“I’ve got the perfect solution, just find a girl who’s just like your mother.”

A few months later they meet again and his friend says,

“Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?”

With a frown on his face, Thomas answers,

“Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much.”

The friend said, “Then what’s the problem?”

Thomas replied,

“My father doesn’t like her.”

A young boy is pulling his wagon up a hill when one of the back wheels falls off and rolls down the hill.

The young boy says: “I’ll be darned.”

A local pastor heard him and said:

You should not say that.

Next time your wheel falls off say:

‘Praise the Lord.’”

So the next day the young boy is pulling his wagon up the hill and the wheel falls off and rolls down the hill.

The young boy says:

“Praise the Lord.”

The wheel stops rolling, turns around, roIIs back up the hill and puts itself back on the wagon.

The young boy being very surprised by this exclaims:

“I’ll be darned!”

A wife asks her programmer husband to go to the store

‘Can you go down to the store, and get a gallon of milk, and if they have eggs, get 6.’

Later on, he returns home and she looks at his purchases and says

‘ Why do you have 6 gallons of milk?’

He responded

‘They had eggs.’