10/16/2024 from Daily Jokes
#19142
A shepherd looks over at his flock of sheep in the pasture.
The day is ending soon, and he has to herd the sheep into their pen for the night.
The shepherd calls for his trusty sheepdog and asks it to get the job done.
“Right away, sir,” says the sheepdog.
10 minutes later, and the shepherd glances out his window to see the sheep safely in their pen.
The sheepdog bounds in through the door to report the completion of its task.
“Excellent work, did you get all of them?” asks the shepherd.
“Yes, all 40 of them.”
The shepherd stares confusedly at the sheepdog.
“Hang on, I thought I only had 37 sheep?”
The sheepdog replies,
“Well yes, I rounded them up.”
10/15/2024 from Daily Jokes
#19138
A man went into the kitchen to make breakfast and was shocked to see a rabbit sitting inside his refrigerator.
He yelled
“Hey! What are you doing in there?!”
The rabbit asked back
“Well this refrigerator is a Westinghouse, right?”
“I guess… What difference does that make?”
“I’m westing.”
10/14/2024 from Daily Jokes
#19121
A couple is walking in East Berlin on Christmas Eve.
They feel a slight precipitation.
“I think it’s raining,” says the man.
“No, it’s snowing,” replies the woman.
“How about we ask this Communist officer here? He is always right!” exclaims the main.
“Officer Rudolph, is it raining or snowing?
“Definitely raining,” Officer Rudolph replies before walking off.
The man turns to his wife with a smile.
“See? Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
10/13/2024 from Daily Jokes
#19116
A girl takes her big fat cat to the vet.
“My cat is very fat,” she says.
“Alright,” says the vet.
“I will look at him.”
The vet picks up the cat and examines its teeth.
Then she looks at its eyes.
Then into its ears.
Finally, she turns to the girl and says,
“I’m very sorry. I’m going to have to put your cat down.”
“Oh no! Because he’s so fat?”
“Yes,” says the doctor.
“My arms are very tired.”
10/12/2024 from Daily Jokes
#19108
A 60 years old billionaire marries a young 25 year old girl…
After honeymoon they throw a party celebrating their marriage…
After a few drinks, billionaire’s friends want to know the secret of how he landed 25 yo young lady..
“It’s simple” billionaire boasts…
“I faked my age”
“Yes, but even for a 40/45 years old guy…she is sensational, what age btw did you tell you are?” A friend asks.
With a smile on his lips billionaire responds
“85 years old”