Daily Joke: Jokes Library

“How are you doing?” said a young guy bumping into his friend at the bar.

“I was fine…until last night.”

“Why? What happened?”

“My girlfriend and I were talking about how many people we had slept with.”

“Oh, what did she say?”

“She said she could count the number of guys she’s slept with on one hand.”

“That’s good, surely?”

“Yeah, I was relieved…but then I saw she was holding a calculator.”

If you think Cancun is the way you buy racoon at the grocery store,(YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK).

A guy was standing glumly at the bar.

“What’s up?” asked his friend.

“My wife suggested we should play some sex games to spice up our love lives.”

“Yeah, what’s wrong with that?”

“Well, unfortunately ‘Guess who I shagged last night?’ didn’t go down too well.”

One guy asked another: “Have you ever gone to bed with an ugly woman?”

His friend replied: “No, but I’ve woken up with plenty.”

A guy wandered over to a beautiful woman in a bar and started chatting her up. Not too far into the conversation he said: “Do you mind If I ask you a personal question?”

“That depends on how personal it is she replied”

“Okay,” he said tentatively. “How many men have you slept with?”

“No way I am going to tell you that!” she snapped. “That’s my business!”

“Oh, sorry,” he said. “I didn’t realize you made a living from it.”