Daily Joke: Jokes Library

There were 2 men at a bar, the first man said to the other one, “I know a bridge where you can jump off and return safely.”

The other man who was shocked asked the man to show it to him. After they finished their drinks the second man asked him to demonstrate, so the first man jumped off the bridge and flew back.

The second man dumbfounded decided why not give it a try. He jumped off and died.

When the first man went back to the bar the bartender said, “Superman you are so cruel when you are drunk!”

Her minister told an eighty-year-old woman that, at her age, she should be giving some thought to what he called “the hereafter.” She said to him, “I think about it many times a day.”

“Oh, really?” said the minister. “That is very wise.”

“It’s not a matter of wisdom,” she replied. “It’s when I open a drawer or a closet, I ask myself, ‘What am I here after?’”

A man takes his place in the theater, but his seat is too far from the stage.

He whispers to the usher, “This is a mystery, and I have to watch a mystery close up. Get me a better seat, and I’ll give you a handsome tip.”

The usher moves him into the second row, and the man hands the usher a quarter.

The usher looks at the quarter, leans over and whispers, “The wife did it.”

They say that when a man holds a woman’s hand before marriage is love; after marriage is self-defense.

A cannibal chief invited over another cannibal chief from a different tribe over for dinner.

They sit down and eat the best meat.

After dinner, the visiting cannibal chief said, “Wow that was good! Your wife makes the best meat.”

Then the other cannibal chief said, “Yeah, I’m gonna miss her…”