Daily Joke: Jokes Library

As a group of frogs was traveling through the woods, two of them fell into a deep pit.

When the other frogs crowded around the pit and saw how deep it was, they told the two frogs that there was no hope left for them.

However, the two frogs decided to ignore what the others were saying and they proceeded to try and jump out of the pit.

Despite their efforts, the group of frogs at the top of the pit were still saying that they should just give up.

That they would never make it out.

Eventually, one of the frogs took heed to what the others were saying and he gave up, falling down to his death.

The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out.

When he got out, the other frogs said,

“Did you not hear us?”

The frog explained to them that he was deaf.

He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.

Moral of the story:
People’s words can have a big effect on others’ lives. Think about what you say before it comes out of your mouth.

There was a group of elderly women gathered at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with your husband.

The old women were asked,

‘How many of you love your husbands?’

All the old women raised their hands.

Then they were asked, ‘When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?’

Some women answered today, some yesterday, some didn’t remember.

The women were then told to take their cell phones and send the following text to their respective husband: I love you, sweetheart.

Then the women were told to exchange phones and read the responding text messages.

Here are some of the replies:
1. Eh, mother of my children, are you sick?
2. What now? Did you crash the car again?
3. I don’t understand what you mean?
4. What did you do now? I won’t forgive you this time!!!
5. ????
6. Don’t beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need?
7. Am I dreaming? ???????
8. If you don’t tell me who this message is actually for, you will die today…!!!
9. I asked you not to drink anymore.!
Last one is ultimate
10. Who is this?

Husband to Wife:

Tomorrow is your birthday. What gift would you like ?

Wife: A giraffe !

Husband: Darling, please be reasonable. Where do I get a giraffe from? Ask for something that is possible.

Wife: Ok, then give up drinking. That you can do and I’ll accept it as a good gift.

So next day……

He Brings The Giraffe for her.

At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings.

Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam’s ribs.

Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and she said,

“Johnny, what is the matter?”

Little Johnny responded, “I have pain in my side. I think I’m going to have a wife.”

With all the new technology regarding fertility,

An 88-year-old woman was able to give birth to a baby recently:

When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, various relatives came to visit.

“May we see the new baby?” One of them asked.

“Not yet.” Said the mother.

“I’ll make coffee and we can visit for a while first.”

Another half-hour passed before another relative asked.

“May we see the new baby now?”

“No, not yet.” Said the mother.

A while later and again the guests asked.

“May we see the baby now?”

“No, not yet.” Replied the mother.

Growing impatient, they asked.

“Well, when can we see the baby?”

“When it cries.” She told them.

“When it cries?” They gasped.

“Why do we have to wait until it cries?”

“Because I forgot where I put it.”